Beachgoer Extraordinaire Gifts

"That can't be good."

No You Do Not Have A Beer Belly: You've just developed a liquid grain storage facility.'

'It happens all the time, don't worry, I'll read my book while I wait for high tide...'

'We buried Dad in the sand, Mom!'

"Let me guess. It's another great beach read."

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"That’s great, but where’s the Frisbee?!"

"Is she breastfeeding in public?! That's disgusting!"

Beach Barbecue

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

Scene of seagull troops about to charge a picnic.

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

it my imagination or is it getting warmer?"

Honey remember what I said about feeding the birds.

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

Periscope spies beautiful water-skier.

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

Summertime

"As some of you may have guessed I got yesterday's sunburn factor wrong!"

Shellfie

"I need a holiday that guarantees perfect weather, good beaches and romance!"

'If that's a proposal, I accept!'

"Jeepers, I didn't know anything could gets so hot!"

"I'm sorry- I can barely hear you with this goddam ocean behind me."

"Make a sandcastle with you? Of course darling. What about Thursday 3.15pm?"

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

'I need a sun cream with a very high protection factor.'

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

43AD: Romans invade Britain.

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'