Beach Skeptic Gifts

"I've never been much of a beach guy."

"Nation-building never works."

Academics At The Beach: The Old Man And The Sea

Reverse psychology

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

A Poem about Sand

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"We're not on vacation anymore. The company folded."

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

Sandcastles

"I'll bet a lot of people wish they had a royal palace to return to."

Workaholic on a cruise

'I didn't give planning permission. Did you?'

"I can't stop thinking about all those available parking spaces back on West Eighty-fifth Street."

"My husband won't do Florida - too sunny. He's afraid of falling asleep on the beach and waking up 75-years-old."

"I like anything but long walks on the beach."

"Don't be afraid of sharks. They generally attack only when provoked."

"IBM up 2 1/4, ATT down a 1/4,GM ... "

The End of the Internet

Sigh...things wear oud, dust collects, people die... Why can't you just relax and enjoy life? Because one thing really worries me... Reincarnation, right? ou know me too well, woman.

Senior Investment Analyst R.G. Thornhill glimpses the Universe in a grain of sand and is not impressed.

Academics at the Beach: "Camus might agree with you. De Beauvoir? Maybe. But Sartre? Never."

The Adventures of Morton - Reincarnation.

Woman painting a man drowning.

"I hope you like sandy beaches, fresh ocean air, and bumper to bumper traffic"

Woman has squashed the man she is looking for.

A beach has meters.

'Just stop for a minute. Smell that pine scent. Drink in the view. I don't think we could pick a better site for our 'Mega-Mall'!'

'I don't think that's what Daddy meant, when he said you could 'bury him in the sand' dear! '

Young Jesus learning to walk on water with waterwings around his ankles.

Arbitrageur in Exile

"I get it...you went south for the winter. Now, don't you think it's time to ditch the shirt?"