Bathroom Battle Survivor Gifts

Scene of man brushing his teeth with electric tooth brush gone wrong.

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

Stop hogging the sheets

"Hey Rudy, you've been in there for over an hour. You OK in there?" "I think I'm dying here." "What? D'you need me to call 911?" "I don't think that'll help." "I just need to build more pikemen and cavalry and buy a defense boost before the enemy's march reaches my city." "Get off your phone!!!" "I'm saving a kingdom here! It's important!"

"I. . . hate . . . bath day."

"We're never going to be able to give Moses a bath, are we?"

School of Comparative Anatomy

"Travel the dark corridor over shoe mountain. Avoid the couch ogre lest he steal your soul. The third door is the bathroom you seek."

'Anything to get out of taking a bath.'

'I don't know how I got rid of mildew before Henry got me the flamethrower.'

'Do you really want me to get in there and pollute all that nice clean water?'

Do you know why the kitchen ceiling is dripping?

'This bathroom ain't big enough for the both of us.'

'The snake and plunger didn't work, so I'm going in...'

'All clear!'

Man wetting himself in a toilet queue.

Dance of the Inconsistent Water Temperature

'I told you not to lean on the door Ronald!'

"I slipped on a bar of soap in the bathtub, and my gun went off."

A woman is attacked by toilet water

'We're having a bit of a problem with the drainage in our bathroom. . .How soon can you get somebody out to us?. . .Have you got anything earlier than Tuesday?'

Job #1 is Doing #2 Outdoors

Departures - Portaloo.

"I'm sorry, mom. I couldn't hold it."

"But it still had some sentimental value."

'Mrs Golcz, put the gun down, Mr, Golcz put the toilet seat down and everybody stays healthy,'

'Well, Mom...today I learned what WON'T flush!'

'The going's a little soft today, isn't it?'

'Have you been missing the toilet bowl again?'

Secondhand hairspray.

"So THAT is why you don't sit and flush!"

'I'm camping out here tonight. It's the only way I can guarantee getting into the bathroom in the morning!'

"I've got two teenage daughters and only one bathroom! This is the only way I can take a shower!"

Greasy film crew.

Buck Newton