Basketball Guru Pillows

'This is Elrod. He's a scoring machine.'

"Good game."

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

No-Work Orange

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

The Salmon Run

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

'Let's go over our secret play.'

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

Bingo night.

'See how the fools flee when fantasy role-play is fantasy no longer!'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

"I'm watching the dog cheat at solitaire."

The Goalkeeper

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

It can be taken up at any age....

Why moms make bad refs.

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

Football team discussions.

Input From The Front Office

Golf lessons

I love Basketball.

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

"We don’t understand this game. Every time we touch the metal part, he tells us to lawyer up."

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"