Basketball Buddy Gifts

And the crowd goes wild—except for Mary, because she wasn't paying attention.

Last night I found some great food that had been thrown away. Stop talking trash and play the game!

"The bad news is he only has two minutes to live. The good news is it's in football time."

'Super Dog'

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

Exercising

Playing pig

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

'It's a combination of March Madness,,, and Linsanity,'

'...You push the wrong button, and now, instead of our fans enjoying a fireworks display, we've got an international incident on our hands.'

'Anderson! On this team we slap hands or slap fannies after someone scores a run. We do not slap faces.'

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

'Wow! That yogapilates has really paid off!'

Try Our New Slam Dunk Coffee and Donut Special.

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

Game In A Can.

Basketball injuries.

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

The International Airline Basketball Tournament

"He just married me on the rebound."

'Well, that was a mismatch. . . ok, we need a volunteer - who wants to guard Godzilla?'

'This is Role Model Man. He is our new assistant coach in charge of projecting a positive image to impressionable young minds.'

Many people suspect that the players aren't the only ones on steroids.

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

"What was the name of that adoption agency?"

'...So what if all the other parents screamed at the umpire?...'

"Why does he keep in the same players?"

"I love you. We all love you. Now throw some strikes."

'Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Timeout!!'

The waitstaff at Luigi's like to have fun when they administered the Heimlich maneuver.

Sit-ups / Stationary-ups