Baseball Gifts

Taking the dog for a walk.

"Let's go slider, fastball, curve, beanball, fight, ejection, shower, beer."

"Want to know what I think?"

"There's your problem."

"For security, our signs need to be at least eight characters long."

Spring Training

Sisyphus' baseball game

"hey fans! im at bat,. btm 9th, bases loaded, score tied--oops, jst got called strike1!"

"I love you. We all love you. Now throw some strikes."

"Oh, hell."

"The client looks bored, Leventhal - take off your shirt and run around the infield."

'Somewhere, there's a little league game that won't go into extra innings.'

"As your attorney, I must strongly advise you against bringing the high heat."

"Actually, I'm not a New York Yankees fan. I'm a New York Yankees cap fan."

'Ssssssh! There it is again. Hear that? It sounds like a muffled scream.'

As senior assistant groundskeeper, Louie was responsible for dragging the infielders before every game.

Inside Baseballs

Strikeout Dog

'It looks they are enforcing the three strikes law!'

'Don't rush me! I need some time to process everything.'

It was the bottom of the ninth and the bassists were loaded.

'He's our power hitter - but only on sunny days.'

'Swelling, Babcock, is our body's way of telling us that something's wrong. But if you insist on staying in the game, hey, it's your elbow.'

'Sun got in my eyes? Wind got hold of it? Struggling with 'Personal issues'?..'

A fellow participating in many activities and everything is fine until someone bumps his car and then his back hurts,

"The good news is it's the size of a baseball."

"Magritte Takes One High and Inside"

The solar system is replaced by sports balls.

"Are you sure you used human growth hormone?"

"Dear, there's someone here to collect your soul."

'It's a slightly more advanced version of fetch.'

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

"Just remember, if you give a hundred and ten per cent, I get twenty per cent of that."

'Don't be intimidated by his fifty million dollar salary...Just think of his as a guy with a tax problem.'

'Here's your problem,your chimney is full of bats.'