Barnyard Prankster Pillows

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Sick Rancher Humor

Moo! OOM!

Police Cow!

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'For show and tell today I've brought in the report cards of our teacher, which I downloaded!'

'Your barn door's open.'

'This will teach them to clean up after themselves after they camp in our woods!'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'He's been like this ever since he found out that he's a Rare Breed ...'

'Is it slop yet?'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

A cow's bedside table.

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

"We need less cowbell!"

'Abandon Sheep.'

Sheep Ballast

Sorry Jerry, you've gone all muffly. Have you been shat on again?

Daisy was adamant she was not going to give any of her milk away today!

"Here's a funny joke for you. A bartender walks into a barn..."

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

We only follow one star round here, buddy!

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

'Come on girls, can you at least pretend I rule the roost when the farmer is around...'

Cow being clamped for milk.