Barnyard Comedies Gifts

Table Dancing Hits the Heartland...

Cow Show Tunes

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

Moo! OOM!

Police Cow!

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'Your barn door's open.'

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'What's that smell?'

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

'Is it slop yet?'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

'No. I insist. You first.'

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

"We need less cowbell!"

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'Abandon Sheep.'

Farm Humor.

Sheep Ballast

Cow being clamped for milk.

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

'Come on girls, can you at least pretend I rule the roost when the farmer is around...'

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"