Baristas Gifts

'We thought hiring a 'barium barista' would make patients a little more excited about their fluoroscopy exam.'

Are we a bunch of losers? Who are you talking about? Me, Randy, Sadie, even you Uncle Mort – all of us cafe regulars. We've been hanging out at this place for years. I've been working here two decades. Do we have nowhere else to go? More powerful even than inertia: Any momentum killed by an uncompromising nap regimen. Zzzz.

One extra large latte with whole milk

Selling lemon latt�

"Hold on, I'll make that coffee to go!"

"I hate people buy a coffee and then spent all day in the café working

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

You want me to be a what? A hipster. My research shows caf

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

Today's special... donuts.

"Those new coffee drones are really starting to get on my nerves."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

Non-Power Breakfast

Time for tea and friendship.

'Who gets the decaf?'

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Mea Maxima Cuppa

"Right now it's between you and two hundred and fifty other people who came to Seattle, moved in with five roommates, joined a band, took a job in a coffee bar, got fed up, had a meeting with themselves, and decided it was time to go out and find a real job."

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

Boss, remember when you said you'd consider giving me a raise if I were to show initiative? No. I used the caf

'Can I have flies with that'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

Evolution of a coffee drinker.