Barbecue Buff Gifts

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

'What p***es me off the most about all this is that I used to enjoy church barbecues...'

'So much for our raw food diet.'

'Fetch me the leftover meatballs! Thanks!'

'Bloody hell - you took your time didn't you?'

'Sorry, sir, but I had to throw all your t-bone steaks to your dogs so they wouldn't attack me. . . um. . . that'll be $49.71 please. . .'

"I never think about cholesterol when I'm on vacation."

What not to say at a vampire barbecue.

Blackened Fish: BBQ until the smoke detectors inside the house go off.

"I laid new sod on my front lawn and a German Shepherd pooped on it. Then his dog showed up."

"We get all our meat from a man dressed like a butcher."

"We've got friends arriving in ten minutes and you're telling me you can't light the barbecue?"

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

The bitchin' about gas prices Bar & Grill.

Suntan Lotion - Three Exciting Fragrances: Barbecue, Smokey Bacon and Sunday Roasts.

Vlad the Impaler - the Later Years

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

"My client alleges attempted hit, run and bbq."

"So...what's a nice grill like you doing in a place like this?"

"Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds." Oppenheimer

"How can you be out of wings?"

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

'Steak Ted?'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'