Bar Game Enthusiast Gifts

'He's even better when he takes the cue out of it's case.'

A Man about to become a Human Darts board

'Hey, Mike. Come here a minute.'

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

'I like you, you've got balls.'

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

"And you've had this headache since you left the pub last night?"

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

Quiz Night...

"Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool?"

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

A mini Kebab take-away and a minibar

'He thought the fire alarm was the bell for last orders, and ran towards the bar.'

Ostrich Bar

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

Inappropriate horse whispering.

Chairs - a bar where everybody has a seat!

"I'm taking a creative writing class. I turned in my checkbook and got an A."

Our changing neighborhood: new store openings.

'I think she just whispered those three little words in his ear - Time,Gentlemen,Please!'

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

"I giggle when I laugh." "I pee when I sneeze."

Whack A Soul.

Raw Piano Bar

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

'I don't think much of this topless darts bob'

Bartender: 'Bad day, huh?' Man: 'I'll say. My vindictive ex-wife just won sole custody of my inner child.'

"I'm not whining."

'If that's my wife, you're not in!...'