Bar Explorer T-Shirts

'Where's the nearest bar?' 'Oh, they's been hibernatin' fer weeks!'

'Man, I expected a lot more than a bunch of dumb guys sitting a at a bar.'

'Okay. Let's go.'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

'No ice.'

Low-Energy Drinks

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

'Let's go to a bar and do something funny.'

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

Complaints Desk

Wine of the Day Club

"She may be a book nerd, but she's the best lab partner I've ever had!"

"So, do you come here often?"

California Beverages Map

'How should I know how things are at home, I moved into the pub a month ago.'

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

Cloning Laboratory: 'I never thought I'd work here.'

'Beer? Wassat then?'

'Another martini please.'

'I promised my wife I was only getting one beer.'

Mad scientist holding bubbling flask in lab

"It's suppose to be tomato juice! That's how you make a Bloody Mary!"

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'It's the same as our regular Angels hair pasta, but with extra grease.'

'This underground facility allows us to be closely involved with proton decay, gravity waves, neutrinos and the growing and selling of mushrooms.'

Gamma Ray Lab/Gamma Ray Shielding Materials Lab

'Don't tell me this nonsense doesn't violate the code of bioethics.'

Since you conduct only thought-experiments, we were hoping you would, from time to time, come up with some thought-results.

'But enough about me... let's talk about you. Do you prefer plain or ribbed condoms?'

'All drinks are double the normal price - it makes me happy.'