Bar Band Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm Jo. Ban Jo."

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"An everything Martini, please."

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

Six jazz instruments.

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'Then after the pan our third album, we split for musical differences..'

"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

A mini Kebab take-away and a minibar

'He thought the fire alarm was the bell for last orders, and ran towards the bar.'

Ostrich Bar

'Hey Are you sniffing at my girlfriend's ae'

'Nothing on the sign says I have to have a person with me.'

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

Guitar Hero.

"I giggle when I laugh." "I pee when I sneeze."

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

Chairs - a bar where everybody has a seat!

'I think she just whispered those three little words in his ear - Time,Gentlemen,Please!'

Our changing neighborhood: new store openings.

Raw Piano Bar

Inappropriate horse whispering.