Banking Jokester Gifts

"Our checks bounced again."

"If a higher interest rate is a sign of a stronger economy, you must think I'm golden."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Let's vote. All those in favour of flying to Switzerland, withdrawing our secret bank account and splitting?"

'How are you at takeovers?'

"Sorry, but you're a loan risk."

And if you help drive the herd all the way to Kansas City, you get to keep one steer for yourself! The first stock option.

'To placate the public, we've done away with the cash bonuses and have found another way to compensate you.'

'I thought up the term 'too big to fail'. So where's my bonus?'

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

A rising tide may lift all boats but I sank all my savings in beachfront properties.

'Give Me All The Money In My Account'

"I have your evaluation...great teamwork, great morale...basically, you're a good dog."

'You call it a beer belly, I prefer to think of it as a lump sum settlement of liquid assets.'

'I need a loan or a bailout so I can evolve,'

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

Secret Identity Theft.

'I'd like to apply for a job as a predatory lender.'

Screw up Assange's finances and I'm closing my accounts.

Luck of the IRS.

'Contract? No contract. We do all our business with nothing more than a handshake.'

"Tag! Your salary's frozen."

"The GOOD news is that customers complaints are down, the BAD news is that we've got no customers."

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

'There's a five dollar discrepancy in my bank balance. Would you mind if I counted the money?'

'A rogue nation robbed the World Bank!'

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

"I'm afraid we don't offer student loans to elementary school pupils."

"We try to inject a little humor in our statements, but you should take them seriously."

"Sorry, but we're only accepting deposits at this time."

'I just asked to see the annual figures...'

'You hold no authority that will allow you passage, and are ignorant of the magic password ... can you at LEAST tell me your mother's maiden name?'

Some cultures use fish as money. 'Got change for a halibut?' 'Sure! Minnows OK?

Cashier for Decoration Purposes Only