Banking Buffoonery Pillows

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

'I thought up the term 'too big to fail'. So where's my bonus?'

A man notices the Chase logo has turned into snakes eating themselves."

'I'd like to apply for a job as a predatory lender.'

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'

'There's a five dollar discrepancy in my bank balance. Would you mind if I counted the money?'

"Sorry, but we're only accepting deposits at this time."

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

Sales chart shows sales going downhill.

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

Full Service ATM: "Do you want fries with that?"

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

Cashier for Decoration Purposes Only

'My latest invention...the credit rock!'

"The Good Lord is an excellent reference, but without a phone number..."

'Your mom likes you ... well, heck, that's all we need.'

"If a higher interest rate is a sign of a stronger economy, you must think I'm golden."

'I want to open a joint account with the riches man in town. . .'

'Oog decided to become a predatory LENDER.'

"The bank has completed the loan application review phase. We're now in the loan denial phase."

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

RBS Cash Machine - Cash Available 24/7

'So when I couldn't pay the mortgage, the bank offered me this rescue package!'

'Well £60 million is LESS than I'm used to...but now that we've agreed my bonus, what working capital will the Bank have?'

"Collateral? How about I teach you what ties to avoid?"

"Once upon a time there was a kind old bank that did not charge its customers a fee."

I'm thinking of taking the next step and becoming a snail...what mortgages have you got to offer?

Bank cashpoint reads 'Don't take too much we're having a crisis'.

Forgot My Mother's Maiden Name.

'Need some money for a facelift, I presume?'

Bank Stress Test

Zork has one of those unbelievable moments of discovery.