Bank Satire Fans Gifts

'Sorry, we can't do you a 200 mortgage!'

'I wonder how the economy is doing.'

Greek Crisis

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'In today's market news, losers outnumbered those who were wiped out.'

Golden bubbles

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

Banker stepping into 'New image' in 'Savings and Loans' office

'It's a deal, for $15 an hour, I'll stand in front of your office.'

'I thought up the term 'too big to fail'. So where's my bonus?'

'I called you in here because your expenses and contributions appear to be quite elaborate!'

"Well, I guess the bubble has burst over at Phillips Rodny Associates."

A man notices the Chase logo has turned into snakes eating themselves."

"In this company, GDP stands for gree, deception and profit."

'I need a loan or a bailout so I can evolve,'

'Sorry, lad, but I lost all me gold during the recession. All I can give ya is a buck thirty in change!'

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

'The new phone system automatically shuts down if someone says we owe them money.'

'But hey, it's only money.'

Harvest Data Festival

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

"Sorry, but we're only accepting deposits at this time."

'But if we don't pay huge bonuses our top staff will just leave and go and ruin someone else's business!'

'Are you sure it's necessary to sign this part declaring 'all information is true and correct to the best of my knowledge'?.'

Conrad Black loots Hollinger International.

'Everyone is Economizing.'

'Here's a hundred bucks -- now, you give me $101.37.'

"Maybe what's good for Wall Street isn't good for Main Street, but it's great for Tribeca."

"After years of low level burglaries, Robin Hood started to steal from the rich using a sophisticated Ponzi scheme."

'The red phone is my grapevine to Andrea Mitchenll, who hears it firsthand from Alan Greenspan, who hears it first from Ben Bernanke.'

'You're too late...I embezzled it.'

'With all due respect for your horoscope, your loan payment is still due today.'

'Pension fund performance, please give generously.'

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"