Bank Novice Gifts

'Show me in writing that I gave you permission to put my money in Iceland.'

"What's a debenture?"

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

Today we learned to count to one.

The Shrinking Dollar.

Bookstore. The Stock Market for Dummies. It's either an instructional guide or a history of recent economics.

"We rolled your account over, sir, and that just made it worse."

'I'm going to teach you the value of a dollar invested.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

Payback Time

Financial Services For Lawyers...Beginner's Class...

'He's so spoilt, he has his pocket money paid into a Swiss bank account.'

I have a dream.

'Waiter, there's a bank in the soup.'

Paul Wolfowitz.

"Tonight, Daddy's going to teach you how to stay save on the internet."

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

"My assets consist of a piggy bank, 2 teeth for the tooth fairy, and whatever change I find in the living room sofa."

'When I grow up I want to be a bank.'

'No sir, I said could I have an increase in SALARY.'

Friendly banks and Cold and aloof banks.

"I'm sure he was a great blocker when he was playing, but I doubt he'll be a great ad blocker."

'This is your third withdrawal this week... how about a little deposit once in a while?'

'Quantitative easing' made easy for dummies.

Bank Checking and Savings. How about some clouds on your scenic checks since they never seem to clear anyway?

Loans. To make a long story short, my cash flow needs some new tributaries.

'There's been a big bank merger, sir, so you now have a joint checking account with a Mr. Slavomir Bezparyadok of Zagreb.'

Piggy Banks/Cash Cows/Free Chicken Account.

"Avoid financial ventures—your credit line is very short."

"It's a special golf bag for beginners - It has a built-in GPS."

"The Queen beat you to it!!"

'The trouble started when the world put together a large group of synchronized banks.'

'Hey, this is nice! You should see my starter cave!'

"You want to go outside again? I wish dogs had direct deposit."

STRIP Hambone: Training wheels on a computer