Ballgame Joker Gifts

95mph fastball.

Umpire School Taking A Ball Four.

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Football

'Personally I think one great improvement to these tea dances would be some tables.'

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

A woman watches football on her computer.

'People have been known to lose an eye when a wink goes seriously wrong.'

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'George, stop playing with the children.'

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

Adult Absence Notes.

"You idiots … we lost!"

'Jim I don't think you have quite go this 'Iron Man Challenge' thing.'

"Idiot! I signaled for a sinker!"

"Uh ho. It looks like the Ref's giving him the yellow vuvuzela."

'Please! Take these and let my buddy go!!'

'Please be quiet while the attempts to locate your head.'

'Team spirit, my ass.'

Cricket with a hamster in a plastic ball.

A child plots to frighten his father with a fake shark fin.

"I don't know who hid it there but that one's got your name all over it."

'I like you, you've got balls.'

"I'm afraid you've got Sea Monkey pox."

A herd of sheep stand in a field; one sheep is wearing a t-shirt that reads "Staff".

Spiked Ball

'It was Bob's last wish to spread his ashes on the spot where he spent most of his athletic career.'

'I've got a strawberry birth mark.'