Bald And Proud Advocate Gifts

The four stages of male hair loss.

'Of course I want a short back and sides. I've only got a back and sides.'

Superbaldie.

"Y'know, although I went completely bald, I STILL carry a comb in my pocket!"

'Wow, talk about shedding!'

"A shave and a shine."

'Hey, look. This anti hair loss treatment is finally working. My hair's stopped falling out!'

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

'You've got dry scalp.'

"When I said hair transplant I meant more than one."

Baldness Facts

Bald man spraying his head with hairspray

'It's a smaller planet than I thought.'

'I always ask that you be frank and let your hair down providing, of course, you ever grow any hair to let down.'

The shape of things to come

'Your polar ice cap is melting.'

"I don't regret going bald. I just regret growing bald before I had a chance to rock a man bun."

"I'm having a bad forehead day."

'When did you first notice the bald spot?'

'I think you're rocking the bold look, too!'

'Nothing on this planet - Just barren wasteland...'

Advantages of being bald # 1 - Freshly Squeezed Grapefruit Juice

"Isn't it time you shaved that off?"

"Hey - a crop circle! Let's land here...."

Combs for the old.

Bird landing on egghead monk

'Well, if you must run your fingers through my hair.'

'Wisdom is the comb that life gives you after you lose your hair!'

"The only thing getting thinner, is my hair."

"...and how would sir like it?"

'Your exercise program hasn't been a total loss -- at least you're getting thin on TOP.'

Hairdressing for Bald People

'In winter no-one knows that you're bald.'

'Shaving is better because no one can tell if you're really bald or not.'

"What I said was 'You'd look good in a TOUPEE'..."