Baggage Aficionado Gifts

'Well, it's about time you two came home.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

Airport

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

"How's my tripping you up?"

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

'HA! This time, I thought of my passport! It's right here, in my jackets' inside-pocket!'

"Sorry, sir. The baggage must match the passenger."

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

"You overpacked again."

"Any bag that can hold all my things becomes too heavy to carry."

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

"Which free tote goes best?"

'And here's the crown jewel of the collection. It's an '86, totally organic, and the UK Bag Manufacturers' Association rates it a 99.'

'No, the sign's not wrong. Most of our guests like to party all night.'

Baggage Arrivals - Lone suitcase, woman crying 'Oh Darling! It's been so long...'

Where has he been so long?

'Don't you think it's time we bought new suitcases?'

Baggage Claim

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

Bag Lady.

'That's Jeb Lambert. He was actually the first one to say 'paper or plastic'. Before that everyone said 'plastic or paper'... I mean, can you imagine?'

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

Commuter X-Ray