Bad Film Aficionado Gifts

The movie is so bad the server recommends ventilation.

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Getting to Know You

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

Kritik's Korner

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

Canadian film production

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Moby Dick

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Jimmy Cagney.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

"Spoiler alert."

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

Movies vs. Films

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

Film Star Robert de Niro

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

'What do you mean, 'pass the remote control'?... We're at the cinema!'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

Jim Carrey,