Backyard Guardian Gifts

"Thank you for respecting my no-fly zone"

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Deaths from Coronavirus

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Bumble Bee

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

Biodiversity

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

"Relax. They're just crows."

"Beware of God"

Angry Squirrel Can't Get to the Bird Table.

"Sometimes, plastic in the ocean isn't bad... Ooh, that bottle cap will make a lovely bowl for Ed and Nicole!"

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

Earth Day Summit.

Watering the garden gnome

Beware of the Lawn

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

'Eye response, normal.' - Deer Physicals.

Planner at work.

Bert launches his plan to increase property values: Annoyance Free Zone - No politicians, media, pundits, or mimes beyond this point.

'It's only a slug Norman.'