Backyard Gatherings Gifts

George can overreact when people criticise his barbecues.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

You'll be the centre of attention for a job well done!

Bird Bath.

Midwest Winter Items.

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

'Propane ran out.'

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

Suburban street.

"He thinks he learned a new trick - I don't have the heart to tell him it's just an old trick he forgot he knew."

"Thanks for inviting us over to try out your new hot tub!"

"We were sad last year when we couldn't have the whole family over for the holidays, right?"

"What's it gonna take for all of us to eat together like a family?"

'We finally nailed down where our congregation's priorities lie!'

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

'We've been tailgating so long, I think we might be homeless.'

Barbecue: Touch the Chef Inappropriately!

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

Strikeout Dog

Barbecue salesman pointing at cooker - "Top of the line."

Even garden plants like to visit.

"There, there, Dear. Brother Amos momentarily slipped back into his secular life when he said your cake is 'sinfully good'."

"You know, Mark, your tabouli salad makes us look bad."

"I heard you had a little problem with the law."

'My guess is, you might be running the jets too high...'

Brad! Who's that singer I cry to when I'm drunk?

Lobster hot tub.

'I think I see why attendance has been down.'