Backbend Devotee Gifts

Man's contortions hurt his back.

Dog yoga

"My blood pressure stays fine, Doctor, as long as nothing comes between me and my fishing."

Nun Fight.

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

"That's awesome that you taught him to heel, but I just want him to walk normally."

'How come we never get invited to 'come as you are' parties?'

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

Poetry Buff.

"To be honest...if it wasn't for the dog I wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

"Okay, well, welcome everyone, to our first annual shareholders' webcast."

At the park, 1979

"There's nothing like dog-walking for making new friends...."

"Well, there's the stick. One of us is going to have to get it."

'Stroke! ... Stroke! ... Stroke!'

The Dog Botherer.

A.E. Housman

"Please tell me you recently lowered the floor."

'Why didn't you wake me? You made me miss my coffee break!'

Delivered Pretty Much To Your Door!

Steampunk

'Italian, Russian or Ranch?'

'Take five -- I need another cold shower.'

"An own-goal and a rebound penalty, huh!"

'The invitation says casual but of course you don't do casual do you.'

'If you want me, honey, I'll be out here in the orchard.'

Candidates for Water Divining

'I wish I could afford to go fishing.'

Dowser and Beer

What's the big deal about dress-down Fridays?

A sudden change of weather can cause havoc at sporting events.

The yoga instructor's name is Matt. The irony isn't lost on me.