Baby Talk Buffs Pillows

'The child is very illogical'

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Same old same old. How about you?"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

Baby tells other Baby to call.

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Shhh... It's babies app time.'

"That is one absorbent nappy."

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

First Word

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

Maternity Ward

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

"I don't get it! They're both diurnal, so why on earth would they bring back from the hospital a baby that's awake all night?"

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

Parent is going to elaborate lengths to get the baby to eat.

'How many fingers do you see?'

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"