Baby Talk Aficionado Pillows

'I finally memorized my social security number.'

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

Baby tells other Baby to call.

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

Baby has used blocks to spell out 'SO VERY BORED'.

First Word

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

Maternity Ward

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

'How many fingers do you see?'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Uterus: One size fits all.

Giving Birth

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

Maternity Hospital

"What are you in for?"

Newborn making the V-sign

Proud mums.

'Well, he certainly has his Father's vocabulary.'

"She's pretty smart. She already knows enough to spit out vegetables."

Baby talk 101 - Whaaaaa! 'This is a good one. It means, 'Until my every need is met, your life will be hell'.'

'I thought I might try a bit of Stand-up.'

'Mum's water have broken and she's called the doctor. I may be wrong but I'd be calling the plumber!!'

New Dad.

'I guess I wasn't thinking. I bought a return ticket.'