Baby Speedster Admirer Gifts

"He has extremely advanced motor skills."

A midwife holding a baby

'Smith, we need more creativity. You have to learn to think outside the box.'

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'No. no. When your wife asked you to change the baby, she meant the diaper.'

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Whoa

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

31. 19. 55.7.

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

Doughboy Dad

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

"They look so young and helpless."

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

Maternity Ward

'How many fingers do you see?'

Uterus: One size fits all.

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

Bouncing baby

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

My child is a genius.

Who's a cutey?

Maternity Hospital