Baby On Board Brigade Pillows

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"I normally scream and cry on car rides, but I'm saving it all up for when we get on our flight"

The Drummer

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

'I don't have a single appointment between 1:30 and 2. Do you want me questioning the meaning of my existence?'

'Talking to John always raises my self esteem. He's such a great listener!'

Man disposes of baby's nappy in a toxin waste bin.

'I've learned one thing in my years of experience in the business world -- never see a lawyer without seeing a lawyer first.'

"Which one's mine?!"

'That's the guy - lives on a 'narrow boat!'

'Well, it's a boy. And I think I can explain those sudden sharp pains in your rib cage.'

Express Check-out: Two babies or less

"Say when."

Other Peoples Babies.

"Get me the coast.

End of the world insurance.

The Happiest Hen of Accrington

'I use the usual tripod gait - front and back legs on one side along ith the middle leg on the other side.' 'I never thought about it. I just move lots of legs, and then I move lots of other legs.'

"We can try to make mom breakfast in bed, but isn't it a bit early to bother the fire department?"

'What do you mean, there's no menu card?'