Awkward Moments Enthusiast Gifts

'You're right, Paul, she doesn't even know you exist.'

"It's too late, Roger - they've seen us."

'I'm so sorry - my husband has periods of physical involuntariness.'

"So, Son, are you seeing anyone?"

"Do you have that old birthday card?"

"I wonder what she meant by that."

"Baldo wants to get to know Estella Dank better...so I got him this doll to practice on."

"Hey Baldo...can you help me with this?"

'Nice going. I've got a run in my stocking.'

'I like to put all the halitosis sufferers together.'

'He was so cute! I touched his arm, and guess what? He said, 'Jeepers, Creepers'!'

"Of course I come here often. I'm the barmaid!"

By the way, Chasen, that's a toilet seat cover.

'You rate very high in everything, except, of course, people skills.'

blacklisted!

"Dad, you're embarrassing! Tom's front is over here!"

'Pleased to meet you.'

Shy man under table marked Reserved

Miss Duxbury, have some old faithful employees step in here and wish me a merry Christmas.

My Father's Favorite Yiddish Joke

"Sorry, it’s my first day."

"Leda, honey, let's not keep your date waiting!"

Showbiz Awards

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

"You and your daft inventions."

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

"I suppose I should have let a few minutes elapse between declaring my love for you and announcing that I also loved lobster."

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."