Awkward Moments Admirer Gifts

"Care to join me in panel no. 3?"

"There's a little jelly or something on your chin."

He couldn't put his finger on it but something told Colin the date wasn't going well.

Hairy Eddie's big time guide to kissin load a chicks.

The Biggest Carcass of the Year and Stevie's ex-girlfriends just had to show up.

And our next speaker tonight is...

Showbiz Awards

'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'

"Something romantic, perhaps?"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

You're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you, even though there's a fly in my soup doing the backstroke, which is comedy gold!

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

"You and your daft inventions."

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

'Show one more kitten photo,lady and the next time you see me will be on a 'missing' poster!'

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

"I suppose I should have let a few minutes elapse between declaring my love for you and announcing that I also loved lobster."

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

Speed Dating Disasters

'By the way Adrian, it unfastens at the front.'