Award-winning Enthusiast Pillows

"I'm very proud. Someone I've been stalking has been nominated for an Academy Award."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

Welcome to the Team

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

'Guess what? I won again.'

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

Filling the Missile Gap

Soccer coach of the year.

An acceptable level of TV violence.

The Real Russian history

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

'We're looking for an award-winning sales professional. Those are trophies. You're overqualified.'

Clandestine cows.

"...and I'd like to thank all my patients for being so ill..."

"Well...I notice a little criticism on my leadership style..."

Hospital Deaths - "Congratulations, you're manager of the month again"

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

"We don�t do awards ceremonies up here actually"

Rubbish, Poppycock, Balderdash

"...and this one is for the Spritzer Beer account."

You're my Statue of Liberty

Norman E-Mailer

Cartoon Editor: No, No, No, No, No, No, Maybe.

"Here's my idea. . . we offer Trump the Nobel Peace Prize as a quid pro quo for leaving office."

'Too many cliches? Now hold your horses!'

"They finally gave me the employee of the month award, but it kind of loses its meaning when every single other employee has already gotten it five times."

Theodore Roosevelt wins the Nobel Peace Prize.

Most Loyal Employee Award

Lancelot put to the Test.

School administrator of the year "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

'I see you worked in government research - what kind?'