Avid Driver User Gifts

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Golfer Shouts at Ball to Go Into Hole.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

'So much for your new Satnav!'

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

Doug fights back at soaring gas prices.

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

"Mrs. Berg calls my book report a finely crafted debut and she looks forward to my next effort."

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"Barb's such a fast reader."

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

"It's an honest mistake I'm sure we'll never hear of again."

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

Better times ahead.

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

Just drive in small circles, then drop me off by that bush. Poober.

Exit Next Left

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

"No officer, I didn't what the speed limit was. Those signs were going by too fast."

Chillaxing!

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."

'God's speed.'