Aviation Enthusiasts Gifts

Airplane Seatbelts

Scared as Hell Airlines.

'You're charging me for TWO seats; an extra fee for my trunk, and now you've stopped giving out peanuts!...and you call yourself a JUMBO jet.'

The extraction.

'When I press this, the stewardess announces what I've done - and one doesn't often get that level of female attention.'

"Sir, did you order the 'special meal'?"

Santa Puking In An Airplane

'And stay out!'

"When I said to turn off all electronic devices, I didn't mean you!"

Look! It's that new Japanese airline.

Plane drops giant birthday cake from sky

Wrong Brothers about Wright brothers: 'They'll never get it off the ground.'

'I knew the airport was low on parking spaces, but this is ridiculous.'

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

'Ok Captain, let's see if we can get this crate down!'

'I think they've taken stealth technology as far as it can go.'

The Wright Brothers' first flight.

"Take one three times a day after meals."

"I took this flight because of a layover on cloud 9."

"Watch out for the last row. They like to play poker."

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

"I'm just saying. . . it wouldn't have hurt to check the price of an airline ticket."

US Airlines on Thin Ice

"I need a plane I can fly high enough each day to smoke my cigars without offending anyone."

At the flies' bar: 'When I was a young maggot, I dreamed of becoming an Airbus!'

US bans laptops and mobiles on planes

'So...We're not pilots!'

What really happened during US/Russian spy exchange.

Cornering Train

"I never thought I'd say this, but I kinda miss people."

'Wow! Now that's what I call a courtship display!'

Bankrupt Airlines: 'We decided to be real open about it.'

'At least you won't complain about not having enough leg-room...'

Crash survivor with sunglasses.

'I'll find room for it, if you'll find my feet and take my shoes off.'