Air Travel Enthusiasts Gifts

Beverage Service "Distancing"

Welcome to Divided Airlines. We have an announcement. We know many of you have grown accustomed to us periodically misplacing your baggage. But we can do better. We can raise the bar. In the future, we plan on a random basis to open your luggage, take out carious pieces of your clothing and personal items, and accidentally displace them at different airports. You will then be allowed to spend money with us to fly to the airport to retrieve your belongings. We hope you enjoy our heightened effort

We never fly anywhere anymore.

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Servicemen.

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

Newlyweds. . . 10 Years Married. . . 25 Years Married. . . 50+ Years Married.

TSA Noah

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

'Stop pulling that silly face, Dear.'

Cow Blue Arrows

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

Geese's Thoughts.

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

Airplane Mode.

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

"Folks, if you look out of your window at those clouds below, you'll have a nice view of the Grateful Dead dancing bears."

'Dad, may I use the plane tonight?'

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

'You know, just because they ask, doesn't mean you have to let them fly.'

'Oops! Sorry! I should've said, 'buckle your seat belts'!'

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."