Avian Advocate Gifts

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

How to tell you might be getting too close with your pet.

'Loook, lady, my name is Frank, not Polly, and I don't want no stinkin' cracker!'

'If it happened at your birdhouse, your homeowner's insurance should cover it.'

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

Veterinary Clinic. No, it's not a "wading" room.

"Good heavens! She cooked Uncle Henry!"

'The bird bath is broken.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Wh..? Hey, get hold of yourself, you've been flying ever since you were hatched!'

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

Foolish Sid turns to look, and is immediately tackled and devoured by the duck.

'Are you a friend or a relative of the bird?'

"You don't want me. I've got bird flu!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Trial by Media

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Thank you, Essential Workers

Cat and dog at a will reading.