Automobile Manufacturer Gifts

Tune up.

Another Turning Point in the Industrial Revolution. Ford Motor Co. On second thought, let's put the cars on the conveyor belt.

Things you don't want to hear on a blind date.

The first car accident.

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"What old school? This is my life."

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

Bob's Driving School.

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

Is Driving Doomed?

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'It seats two comfortably.'

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

"So...do you have a job now?"

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

Otto the SmartyCar!

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'