Automobile Interest Gifts

'Remember, if you have an accident, the newspaper will print your age.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

The first car accident.

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Coexist. Coexhaust.

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

Another Turning Point in the Industrial Revolution. Ford Motor Co. On second thought, let's put the cars on the conveyor belt.

"What old school? This is my life."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

Is Driving Doomed?

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'It seats two comfortably.'

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

Once upon a time and a half. Buick and the Beast.

"So...do you have a job now?"

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

Otto the SmartyCar!

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

'It's St Patrick's Day...I thought you called this car your lucky charm??!'