Attending Rallies Gifts

Sloaney Pony.

"Away with the warmonger!"

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

'Is our tent getting smaller, or are we fat cats just getting fatter?'

"Those MORONS! I have way more chest hair than THAT! Ha!"

'He hasn't missed a turnout in ten years!'

"How much longer, roughly, will you be introducing me as a 'disgruntled Republican'?"

I am your BIGGEST fan!

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

"You've got to blurb me to her."

"At least we've got a nice day for it..!"

'On the Internet we found weapons of mass intrusion.'

'I don't know -- maybe an evil robot from the future IS the kind of President we need.'

Hillary Clinton

"Ok, no more political arguments, you know I'm on the left."

'I know how worked up everyone is, but let's keep the bird calls to a minimum.'

"Say, isn't that Rudy Giuliani?"

"Any apologies for absence?"

TRUMP

'It was a very friendly reception - the Democrats even registered me to vote!'

Holy Moses!

Courage

A right of privacy party.

'I told you not to let the children play with your Tony Blair effigy.'

'We both like walking in the rain, and we both love a parade, but I just can't stand it when she rains on my parade.'

The rally driver's breakfast

"Hold yer fire! It's just a t-shirt cannon!"

'Why do rally drivers think they are the only ones on the road?'

"Well, because today is Friday the 13th."

'It was a very friendly reception - the Democrats even registered me to vote!'

'If re-elected, I promise to do everything in my power to avoid prison!'

Coalition dummies.