Attending Law School Pillows

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"If you really want independence, you should get into contract law."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

I love Lawyers

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"Hey, I just figured out how to sue the school for loss of my prime childbearing years."

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

Barristers

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Truth

Law School teacher.

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

Planet of the Lawyers

"We make crime pay."

Do Guns Kill?

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

'I'd like to go back to law school and pay attention this time.'

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."

Best System in the World