Attending Easter Service Gifts

'Personally, I prefer a more traditional message for Easter Service.'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Tartine

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

Priest's 'To do' list.

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"Too much sugar."

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

An Unexpected Guest.

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

Night-time halo

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

The Mouse Princess

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

Butterflies

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

Happy Easter

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Early Piety