Atmospheric Explorer T-Shirts

'Harold, you moron, you're standing on smog!'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Outer Space Outsourcing

Alien David statue

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

Swinging on a star.

"Look what I found, dad!"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

"Houston, we have a problem."

Painting clouds

'But what is the universe for?'

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

Alien Snowmen

"It's the dawn of a new era"

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

How am I abducting?

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

The flies have landed.

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'