Astro Explorer T-Shirts

'Today's horoscope...Uranus is shining brightly and you'll have a chance encounter with a Leo...Huh!...what a load of mumbo jumbo'

'No kidding! I'm a Leo too!'

"Mission control - we've found signs of water."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

Outer Space Outsourcing

Alien David statue

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Look what I found, dad!"

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

'But what is the universe for?'

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"Houston, we have a problem."

God Sneezes Out Creation

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"Would you relax? They never look up."

Alien Snowmen

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

The First Martian Dog.

Mayhem, Inc. Part 1: Prologue

October 11, 2009: History is made when 8-year-old Tommy Wurtner becomes the first child to enter space.

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

The flies have landed.

"I understand this diner has quite a reputation."