Athletics Aficionado Gifts

'With the latest gold prices I think your medals are worth more than mine.'

High jumper with performance-enhancing drugs.

The British relay team find a safe way of handing on the baton.

Pole Vault Rules

Multitasking executive dog

Late entry in the Hop, Skip and Jump event!

Doping - high jump

'I guess you're not from around here. In this region of the country football is in the religion section.'

'George is Jessica Ennis' biggest fan.'

101 uses of a dead cat: spring board.

'He's been gone a good five minutes.'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

First Prize!

Man looking at book about Triple Jump.

Javelin Rocket.

Discus accidents.

'Just remember at the Olympics the finish line has become the bottom line.'

"Portrait of a Lady"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'Top of the line sport shoes: They've improved my top speed by 0.5 kmh...'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

Cristiano Ronaldo

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

Joey Barton's red card wins Premiership League for Manchester City.

The Harper Plays Cricket.

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

Fox hunting.

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois