Athletic Achiever Gifts

' Don't you think your taking this exercise wheel a bittoo seriously?'

'Bigley, you're over-training!'

Bernard Hinault

Ryan Bayley

Winners

"That's nuthin'. Yesterday he beat up Alex Rodriguez."

It's harder to pitch a perfect game in baseball than to roll a perfect game in bowling. In bowling it only takes twelve strikes.

Blazing Volleyball

"A new record for 1,499 meters!"

Tyrone Mings

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"