Assistant Bank Manager Gifts

'Stan, you are assistant bank manager now, no more sunning yourself during lunch.'

Spot the difference.

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

The Shrinking Dollar.

"And we will absolutely start lending again as soon as we finish building our debtors' prison."

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

Looks like the bank's director still inside.

"Who's next?"

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

"Once upon a time there was a kind bank manager who found all the money lost in the global financial meltdown, brought world peace, stopped global warming, cured the common cold and discovered Julian Assange is Santa."

'Mr. Hickey really knows how to keep our stockholders meetings short and sweet!'

'That's my boy...'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

Bank notes coming out of a safe.

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'You wouldn't threaten your bank manager...er...maybe...'

"Want to trade banks with me?"

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

No one ever tried to rob the Samurai Bank.

'He's so spoilt, he has his pocket money paid into a Swiss bank account.'

'Actually, we were hoping you could loan some money to us.'

"You want to withdraw your money? There's a fee for that."

Branch Manager Interviews: "Who's next?"

'We're seeking a safe tax haven for our investments.'

"Safe FDIC insured, guaranteed 2.65% APY...check out our new Emotional Support CDs."

"I'm afraid with your income I couldn't possibly approve a loan of that size. Would you like a list of our approved loan sharks?"

loan

"We must do something about the bloated, fat cat image bankers have a acquired...I think I'll settle for a bigger chair!"

Do not feed the clerks.

'Miss Roberts, turn off the video camera!'

I have a dream.

Another Rogue Trader

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

'If you can control your emotions I will make you a branch manager. Yippee.'