Aspiring Pro Gifts

'I'm thinking of jumping right from JV ball to the NBA.'

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

What else is there to wish for?

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

The Amateur Golfer

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

"We thought we could put in the details later."

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'

'W e e e l l . . . my mum says I'm good at testing the patience of saints'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

"This better be important."

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

Spin Dentistry...'Hollywood, here I come...'

Always stick to the script.

"I consider it an honor just to be sitting with someone who's thinking of becoming an actress."

"My life is a powerful blast tocenter field easily snagged on the warning track."

'Jeff! You need to keep one foot on the ground!'

'How do you expect me to fine tune my act if you keep taking me to the principal's office?

'Just because everyone applauded when you dropped your lunch tray in the cafeteria, doesn't mean that you should pursue a career in show business.'

"And you thought I couldn't find Hudson River views in your price range."