Aspiring Cricketer Gifts

Jack Hobbs

'They all want to play the star.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

Mr. K's essay is such a drag! Yeah, but I've got to do really well. Twig! You're such a grind! Am not! Life isn't only about grades. I know! But he's directing the spring musical. And my singing won't get me the part all by itself! English: Gateway to the Grammys.

The Amateur Golfer

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

"I'm not an intern, I'm a squire. I'm not an intern, I'm a squire..."

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

Multisports

'I couldn't practice last night on account of my Dad's head was gonna' explode.'

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

I'm trying out for the spring play. You'll be great! Ha! You'll be grateful to be an usher, Meryl Creep. Yeah. The good parts go to real actors. Sigh. The arts are sooo uplifting.

"I'm not sure I'd want fifteen minutes of fame. Mum would only follow it with fifteen minutes of criticism."

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'W e e e l l . . . my mum says I'm good at testing the patience of saints'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

Cricket cake

'You daft cow...I said I needed some company and was out for a duck!'

No wonder kickboxing seems so hard.

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."