Artistic Crime Solver T-Shirts

"Sir, the William Tell burglar has struck again!"

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"Don't make me send in the bad cat."

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

'Apparently my DNA had guilt written all over it.'

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

'Where my balls go?'

Dog detectives

Phone Hacking Explained - 50 p.

Undercover Biophysicists

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

'Ragrding our cash-flow problewm, it's agreed then...Sims enters the bank at 10am, Riggs will follow, and Yates drives the getaway car...'

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

'We suspect death by Sunday supplement.'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

STRIP Hambone: Computer an accessory to computer fraud

"Our forensic scientist quit, so our computer guy has stepped in for now."

Locking Up Crime

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

"3:14 p.m. Suspect drives to lakeside resort. Rents rowboat under false name. Tosses evidence into... wait, how do I tell anyone?" Topper: Undercover police dog

"Well well, Mr. Chamberlain. It seems you've discovered my secret."

CSI Fridays

Sistine murder

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

'You're experienced with blood stains I trust?' (Smarthy ACME Carpet Cleaners)

'This is a simple case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.'