Artisan Breadhead Gifts

"How are we on bread?"

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

"My mother taught me about baking. She was a great roll model!"

A couple watch apprehensively as six witches fly around their gingerbread birdhouse

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

I bake my own bread.

Baker

'Sticky nuts...' "Umm nice nuts but not as sticky as us buns!!"

'...Well, this is it Lana...the place where I was born and raised!'

Now play some Metallica!

"See, that's your problem right there - the roof is mostly sugar."

"Bingo, it's the hippy lady again! She always throws something interesting: last week it was honey-beer bread..."

Baker

Cheesemaker

'You need a new bobbin.'

Bread Stall

"You have some serious bed head, Dear."

'Thinner!'

"The chocolate fudge and whipped cream is okay. But you should have sought planning permission for the giant cherry on the roof!"

In The Olive Garden, we harvest bread sticks year round.

"The way I heard it, after fifteen years of doing cricket teas, his wife finally snapped."

"Pasta-nonymous Tuesdays & Thursdays. Unlimited breadsticks at 7."

'How many times do I need to remind you, Caldwell, that you need to do something about your attention deficit disorder?!'

Out of work baker - I knead your dough.

Closing Laugh D.I.Y.

All baking done on the premises

Bread quality

Your bread maker has a yeast infection.

'I'm thinking of something less frivolous - a meat-and-potatoes format.'

Peanut Butter & Jelly Fish.

"Don't say anything, but these aren't really artisanal bread crumbs."

Monday: Missed the snooze ??" hit the ooze button.

Doctor and patient, "Quite honestly doctor I feel like a new man"