Art Opening T-Shirts

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

'That reminds me, what wine are you serving this evening?'

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Candle Portraits.

Painting taking root...

Misunderstood artist

It's a call from Tate modern.

Picasso: The Early Years

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

Creation of Red Wine

"Now this I get."

Art Gallery.

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

M.C. Escher Exhibit Upstairs.

"So, Sandra, what can you tell us about your lovely mood board?"

'Mom says finger painting was digital art before computers.'

'I think it's the best thing you've ever done!'

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

Leaves falling out of a painting.

"I've just got this sudden craving for pizza."

"I read 'Art News.'"

Private Viewing

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.

"You don't look a day over 30,000."

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

'You're no Pollock.'

Instant art

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

Rodins rotten juggler

"Apparently, if you understand it, you don’t understand it."

"Who's the artist?"